I got a new bedside drawer

from Ikea as-is today. But it was too wide!
Shame on me for my poor estimation, and bless my
mum for being such a genius to make things right!
She had it fixed with 2 planks placed underneath to hold
the weight. Now I have more storage space and a small
workdesk where I can place my laptop. Nice!



And it gave me a good reason to tidy up my room and
clear some clutter, which is good because when I saw all the
brand new items that I can now throw away with no or little
hesitation, I know I had been far too reckless with my money!

And I really am lost about what to do with all my sanrio
possessions! Shit! Now I know it was SO DUMB of me
to think my daughter could inherit all of them because I
obviously did not become a mother quick enough and all
the items are now yellow or mouldy!

And god knows why I need so many pouches and notebooks!

Anyway, getting rid of unwanted things is pretty therapeutic.
It is somehow akin to clearing my mind and soul, although
not in a big way, but it did make me feel slightly more
clear headed.

Someone out there dislikes me very much.
Or should I say, hates me.
I know I can’t expect much since I am bad mouthing and scrutinizing people all the time myself. I know there is this thing called karma in this world. But honestly, I never really disliked the people I bad mouthed about, I only found them distasteful at most.

How do you hate people when you barely talked to them, when you do not know about their backgrounds, their thoughts, their rationales for doing things? How do you hate someone so easily and groundlessly?

Someone at work hates me. She hates me so much that she tells her lunch clique about it and one of them told me in my face: 她最讨厌就是你了！That was fine for me, since she is so insignificant in my life that I don’t give a damn about how she feels about me. Just fark off and leave me alone and hate me for all she wants for all I care. I mean it.

But today, I found out that she sneakily went to one of my shops, and asked one of my staff if I had been visiting the shop frequently and how long did I stay at the shop each time? This dodgy vixen. Vicious and scheming and unscrupulous and despicable, and obviously too free at work.

Who does she think she is? First of all, she is not my superior, we are of equal rank. Secondly, there is no overlap in our job scope, so to say, no common interests, no conflict of interest. Whatever whoever gave her that fat audacity to check on me?? To so hideously question my staff about me?

The vixen, wrinkled and saggy and so close to her expiry date with the company. Single and grouchy and grudging. We all know that. We all had our fair share of shit from her from time to time. She is two seats away from me, and I dare say I greet her in the morning and say goodbye to her with my heartfelt sincerity everytime I walked past, on the account that she existed at least 30 more years than me in this world and empathizing that she is single and lonely and hence twisted. I sensed no hostility, now I know it's because she is just so pretentious.

As much as I do not want to give a damn about her childish acts, I can’t take it lying down that she interfered in my work. She actually checked on me! With an evil intention that I have no doubts about. I can’t help but feel and hate that I am being watched. I can’t help but feel wronged in the sense that she hated me before she even understood me. It makes me shudder when I think about how vulnerable mankind is to insensible jealously and self conjured injustice.

I found out that she hates me because I never got any scolding at work (yea, she thinks!), because I seem to be favored. Because to her, I am this young bitch whose life seems to her like a bed of roses, getting what I want with zero hard work in a much shorter time than what she had used, which is JUST NOT FAIR. Because I have fewer lines on my face and no sagging cheeks and more years ahead to waste and she is almost seeing her end. But what does she know? What does anyone know about my this smooth sailing life?
Nothing.
This is so unbearable.