Yesterday I had the 2nd worst cramps I ever had in my memory.
I rem the worst one I had. I threw up non-stop that my boyfriend then had to call my parents home and they had to drag me to the clinic together to have an injection.
And I was throwing up all the way on my dad's car to the clinic, and almost fell out with everybody because I was feeling so sick my only wish was to lie beside the toilet bowl and die. I REFUSED to go to the clinic.
I even quarelled with the doctor because I was feeling so cold and he wanted me to expose my tummy and refused to switch off the aircon! I wanted to throw up on him!
Come to think of it now, I remember how my boyfriend then had to bear with my vomit breath while I cried and kicked on the floor for several hours.
Just imagine the vomit breath.
I shamefully confess that I did not rinse my mouth at all because image was JUST not in the picture anymore, plus where do I find the strength to do that! It must had been extremely traumatising for a cleanliness and hygenic loving virgo. (and anyone else la..haha)
He innocently only wanted to bring me my favourite food and watch Harry Potter with me on TV. What a dramatic turn.
Just a little incident that came to my mind before I go to bed.
Everytime I survive a cramps experience like that, I tell myself I need to live the next 28 days well to make the pain worthwhile.
But right now, I am feeling lost in this cyber space again. This cyber space brings me so close to things and people I love, but the closer I get, the more intense the feeling of voidness, and the more intense the disappointment of knowing how far you actually are in real life. The more I write and the more I say, the more I begin to doubt if I really mean what I am talking about.
I don't know if anyone knows what I mean. Maybe when I wake up tomorrow and read this entry again, I will also not know what I am talking about.
Time to go to bed then.
Thank you to my parents for taking care of me yesterday, though they really did not know what to do but rush over when they hear me throwing up, and my mum just rubbed "ru yi you" on my tummy non-stop..haha
I will try to live the next 27 days well.
And by the way I love MD's new song...
because it makes me happy! :)
I rem the worst one I had. I threw up non-stop that my boyfriend then had to call my parents home and they had to drag me to the clinic together to have an injection.
And I was throwing up all the way on my dad's car to the clinic, and almost fell out with everybody because I was feeling so sick my only wish was to lie beside the toilet bowl and die. I REFUSED to go to the clinic.
I even quarelled with the doctor because I was feeling so cold and he wanted me to expose my tummy and refused to switch off the aircon! I wanted to throw up on him!
Come to think of it now, I remember how my boyfriend then had to bear with my vomit breath while I cried and kicked on the floor for several hours.
Just imagine the vomit breath.
I shamefully confess that I did not rinse my mouth at all because image was JUST not in the picture anymore, plus where do I find the strength to do that! It must had been extremely traumatising for a cleanliness and hygenic loving virgo. (and anyone else la..haha)
He innocently only wanted to bring me my favourite food and watch Harry Potter with me on TV. What a dramatic turn.
Just a little incident that came to my mind before I go to bed.
Everytime I survive a cramps experience like that, I tell myself I need to live the next 28 days well to make the pain worthwhile.
But right now, I am feeling lost in this cyber space again. This cyber space brings me so close to things and people I love, but the closer I get, the more intense the feeling of voidness, and the more intense the disappointment of knowing how far you actually are in real life. The more I write and the more I say, the more I begin to doubt if I really mean what I am talking about.
I don't know if anyone knows what I mean. Maybe when I wake up tomorrow and read this entry again, I will also not know what I am talking about.
Time to go to bed then.
Thank you to my parents for taking care of me yesterday, though they really did not know what to do but rush over when they hear me throwing up, and my mum just rubbed "ru yi you" on my tummy non-stop..haha
I will try to live the next 27 days well.
And by the way I love MD's new song...
because it makes me happy! :)
posted by joey at 1:00 上午
2 Comments:
wa are u ok? it sounds really serious...-daf
hey sn
u better take care and go to checkup or anything like that,
this kind of thing bu shi shuo zhe wan wan de. bao zhong.
maybe u can try to find some books to read etc? i feel that reading and watching tv actually cures voidness. online really makes pple kx. but not reading and watching tv i tink.
yah haa a harry potter and jap dramas together with me ba.
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